this.Day

blog moving again!

2010-01-06T21:59:00.001-08:00

moving to justinguyen.tumblr.com

yay! it loooks ore awesome, follow if you wish

home sweet home

2009-11-27T11:22:00.000-08:00

Yay! i loved thanksgiving

to be honest, its been a REALLY long while

since i've been downright excited to see family

to help out around the house

its not like i didn't like going home

it is good, just not exactly the same as like going to disneyland

but dang it is nice to be home...i love my bed

UVSA Summit 09!!!

2009-11-16T19:32:00.000-08:00

yay for k-drama picture attempt! i love UVSA

fantastic experience, from Socal to boise, to the stanford girls from georgia..its fantastic to see how far 3 years has taken us. To see the future so bright its so encouraging...looking forward to the year to come

How to Report a Crime

2009-11-12T15:11:00.000-08:00

so i'm doing research on the rape in richmond, yea its kinda old new, but still important
or more specifically the legailty of the 15 or so bystanders
apprently as of 2000 it is ILLEGAL to see someone under 14 years of age as a victim of a crime and not report it
sadly this girl was 15 and not subject to the law, but that does not absolve us of moral and civic responsability
before i give you the instructions....remember...do NOT be a snitch
being a tattle tale will not save someones life, if you can intervene....after all we are one body, one community

but before you jump into the line of fire, do notify authorities

Step 1
Dial 911. Regardless of where you are in the United States, simply calling 911 will put you in touch with a local dispatch center. And with E911 (Enhanced 911) capabilities in most major cities now available, simply dialing the number will provide dispatchers with your immediate location and phone number. Try to stay as calm as possible when on the line with a dispatcher. The calmer you are, the quicker they can process the information and send the help that's needed.

Step 2
Tell the dispatcher exactly what the problem is and where it is taking place.

Step 3
Tell the dispatcher whether or not the incident is still taking place and how many people are involved.

Step 4
Provide as accurate as possible descriptions of the people involved and whether or not the crime is involving weapons of any kind.

Step 5
If vehicles are involved, provide as accurate details as possible, including the color, make, model, license plate and year.

Step 6
If the crime is over by the time you speak with a dispatcher, report what happened and in what direction the individual or individuals fled.

Step 7
Provide your name, address and phone number so you can be reached for additional assistance if necessary.

classifying love

2009-11-11T20:31:00.000-08:00

taken of my diem's note

We all have the potential to fall in love a thousand times in our lifetime. It’s easy. The first girl I ever loved was someone I knew in sixth grade. Her name was Missy; we talked about horses. The last girl I love will be someone I haven’t even met yet, probably. They all count. But there are certain people you love who do something else; they define how you classify what love is supposed to feel like. These are the most important people in your life, and you’ll meet maybe four or five of these people over the span of 80 years. But there’s still one more tier to all this; there is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these loveable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. The person who defines your understanding of love is not inherently different than anyone else, and they’re often just the person you happen to meet the first time you really, really, want to love someone. But that person still wins. They win, and you lose. Because for the rest of your life, they will control how you feel about everyone else.

-Chuck Klosterman (Killing Yourself to Live: 85% of a True Story)

FabTip #1

2009-11-10T10:48:00.000-08:00

Maybe one day this will offshoot into its own lil blog, but for now it sits here

jut fyi: this is written from more of a guy perspective, but i guess it can apply to some the ladies. And i dont view myself as an authority, i dress ok, but these are things that make me cringe a lil

also i need a cooler title...please input!
oh and if you're lazy jsut skip to the bottom, its a summary

#1: downgrade a size
this is for the men obviously, i dont think most girls have this problem.

so in even plainer terms this emans if you're a large go to a medium, medium to a small, etc
this doesn't apply to everyone, but rather for most

you know those fancy shoulder lines on shirts....yes believe it or not they are supposed to sit right at the end of your shoulder, not the bicep, and for goodness sake not the elbow

this doens't mean get a muscle shirt that if you flex you might be mistaken for the hulk, but have it fitting. If you're thin even try going with slim fit

there is NEVER a need to wear a tent. Its sloppy, a waste of fabric, ponchos are cheaper,and it really isn't hiding anything. it does the exact opposite, it attracts undue attention to the very thing you are trying to hide

and if you do have a fit body...show it a little, use the lines made by the shirt...hiding in and XXXL is kinda pointless and i would be afriad of getting it caught in like a door

i'm not hating on the baggy look, it does work and can be pulled off tatefully, but often it is taken to great excess

this also applies to pants...i guess its ok to sag a lil, but you know the ctroch area, should be say somewhere around your crotch, not the knees

In a nutshell:
1. buy shirts that fit...if you're asian its probably a small, unless you are over 6 feet, than a medium...there is almost enver a reason to get a large, unless you want to share it
2. dont be afraid of slim or fitting...its not gay...it actually makes you look better and younger
3. no tents....that means shoulder lines at the shoulders
4. try straight leg or slim jeans...u can also use these to work=)

Paper Gems

2009-11-09T13:08:00.000-08:00

so i found a list of manhood(or lack there of) in the paper today:
imma write it here jsut so i dont forget, check them out if you'd like, i'll try to review one

"The Good men project: Real sotries From the Front lines of Modern Manhood" edited by James Houghton, Larry Bean, and Tom Matlack

"Guyland: the perilous World Where Boys Become Men" By Micheal Kimmel

"The Decline of Men" By Guy Garcia

"Rules for My Unborn Son" By Walker Lamond

i find this subject quite intersting, how in world built by men, for men, is suddenly full of men, who are giving up...we'll see time to hit up the bookstore...gotta find that barnes and noble giftcard....as i said i'll post a review once i get one

A tale of two me's

2009-08-19T23:06:00.000-07:00

Last week i decided to skip bible study.
the bible study i lead
normally i would never think
of even doing such a thing
but this was different
this is was a goodbye dinner for a good friend
one of my first friends in vsa
a friend that had opened this new world.
as she goes off to socal for her doctorate
i am left with some concluding thoughts

can i choose?
do i?
should i?
they feel so very apart
as if i am part of one
i am not of the other

new blog! (well kinda)

2009-08-10T11:53:00.000-07:00

its blog expansion time!
i dunno, i decided to separate
my blog into another section
random newsbits
http://clipsofnews.blogspot.com/
muwhaha, check it out time to time!

When i grow up i want to be.....

2009-08-08T12:38:00.000-07:00

...a pilot:
i love the uniform and always wanted to have my wings (the lil clip on the jacket)
i spent the last summer traveling
and really i don't like living out of a suitcase
but man....i REALLY wanted those wings
not the plastic souvenirs...the real ones

...a national geographic photographer
if you've never opened up a national geographic
or watched the tv channel
you should
seriously
it'll open up your world
the world has so much beauty
that simply cannot be described
and i wanted to go out and capture it

...a priest
mm i have put thought into ministry
i really have
mmm but i dunno
if i'm ready yet
i really do want a family one day
to have the Lord
as all i need
i still got a ways to go

...a teacher
to teach and to be taught
to help teach a new generation
to see children grow up
to empower them
to feel empowered
mebbe one day

...a doctor
i have doctor hands
or so people say
precise and long fingers
alas i cannot do chemistry
i guess i'll have to save people another way

...a superhero
lets save the world
even if its one life at a time
i may not have a cape,
but i still have a voice
my own two hands

...me

the letter

2009-07-31T12:10:00.001-07:00

its been nearly a year form project
and right now i think
is when i would've anted the letter
6 months was alrite
but i dunno life seems to go by years as benchmarks
at least for me

i wonder where i put it...
all my Christmas mail was kinda a mess
i was in Florida at the time

i wonder if i'll break the one year mark
if you do'nt know what that is
let me explain
every year
new friends
new org
new circle
new life
in a year will i still talk to you
in a year will i still care
in a year will i still remember what it was like
to laugh
play
love
will i?

one year...i'll look at this

Why i don't cook/bake

2009-07-27T14:03:00.000-07:00

i'm actually not a bad cook or a baker
i actually really enjoy it
however there is one catch
i don't know how to make personal portions
unless it involves a sandwich
which i actually don't like very much

my real reason though
i don't have anyone to cook for
eating alone
is not only boring
its almost depressing
growing up...i never ate alone
dinner was always with family
or at least my lil bro

too cook without company
mebbe one day i will
or mebbe not we'll see

Why can't i....

2009-07-23T16:20:00.000-07:00

speak whenever i'm around you
its almost an ironic presence
with your presence i feel at ease
that i can be myself
but with you i get tied up
flustered

i've been told i'm kind of intimidating
at first impression
almost a sense of overconfidence
and pride

but here i have none of that
my wings are torn off
i'm brought back to earth
i got nothing left to show

really it frustrates me
i just can't seem to solve this riddle
like walking onto the court
and suddenly forgetting how to ball
i got no charm, i got no swagger
i am but me

is this the true me?
or do i refuse to show that i've grown

NO Lego Lovin

2009-07-22T23:26:00.000-07:00

ok this is not a hate on legos
honestly i love legos
a lot
and i still do
though i hear legoland is quite the letdown

lego lovin has almost nothing to with actual legos
almost
its really about love, and the authenticity of it
or rather lack there of
its made of legos because its not real real
like a lego space ship
it looks like a space ship,
but i have my doubts on its chances of making it to space
or surviving the drop out my window

no lego lovin means
to give the real deal
to give love is that one has to experience it
its hard to show the love of Christ when you don't have it yourself
but even in a absic sense, its like hard to encourage
when you've enver had that.

honestly i think i do this a lot
trying to to be a friend that i never had
giving things i have never received
not that its not nice, but its not authentic
i enver know how its gonna go
jsut try...but in the end
it is kinda of fake
like watching blackhawk down
and being able to feel for a soldier
its a step
its an effort
but it falls greatly short

um i don't know how to end this on a lighter note
but ultamately
we are all a little bit fake
since we can't grasp the totalness of God's love
the only way to be less fake is to be closer to him

Reboot #.....

2009-07-21T14:23:00.000-07:00

another year gone
another quarter past
another chapter closed
another goodbye

talk to sonia.
if you don't know her, you should.
Shes pretty awesome and
seems to always get my mind ticking again.
she may seem small
but she awlays asks some seriously big questions

every year is the same for me,
a new group of friends,
a new core organization.
This doesn't mean i lose friends or drop out of orgs,
just i shift attention. hence reboot.

every year its a reboot
and graduating is no different
mebbe sonia is right
i don't care enough

mebbe i'm supposed
to stick by
hold the line
for better or for worse
although there is truth
in what she says

this is the whole truth:
i care
whole heartedly
i don't stay with anything
unless i really mean it
i don't keep friends i don't want
i don't join orgs i can't stand
but that's not the reason why i move around
not because i don't care for the people, or the vision

its because i don't know where i belong
i can work hard, move up, love sincerely
everywhere and where ever
i really want to find the place for me

mebbe she is right
there is no right place, just choose
but how long do i stick with it?
time is fleeting

I'm tired of my life going nowhere
i've spent a good portion of my life being a steward of others
but its also my life!
when is it my turn?

i'm just frustrated
i want to be patient
i would wait eternity for them
but eternity is not what i have
i feel selfish for moving on
but secretly sometimes i feel
they are selfish for keeping holding me back

i dunno i'll get back to this line of thought later

in a place called diamond jamboree

2009-07-18T23:48:00.000-07:00

well i'm not sure if its shaped like a diamond.....or really if its a jamboree, but its lil plaza in irvine. So here's the story:
if many of you may or amy not know i'm kinda in socal. I ended up on a team building trip on the way to LA. So today we started out with food, obviously....very good food. Than we went shopping at south coast plaza. Honestly i've seen better malls. but some random observations:
1. malls need to be shaped as cricles...the cross method is kinda stupid
2. i still can't afford the things i want to buy
3. luckily i don't have much else i want to buy
4. though south coast plaza has upscale stores i does not feel upscale
5. i attribute this cuz the people look scrubby
6. no means to be racist.....but typical americans have ridculously bad fashion sense.....but they buy nice clothes.....wear do they use it
7. Asian people like looking trendy....as much as people say we put off immediate satisfaction for success.....asians really love a nice car and nice threads and love to wear it....even if its to the barber.
8. and these are observations, and by no means apply to all people...haha its jsut fun stuff...don't take me too seriously

so back to my story. After this we decided to go to the beach instead of to see harry potter.funny how a small decision makes a big difference. like harry potter would've been fun, but the ebach was good too, got a good game of drop in volleyball in, cept i still suck...haha.

after we deccided between korean BBQ or tofu..we chose tofu. Thus went us to ECD tofu house and the 85 degress bakery. my adoration of cakes left me inside the shop while my friends chose a table which happened to be next to a bench having pg. and the seat i chose was the one directly facing her, because i felt like sitting next to a girl i recently met. All that led up to a wonderful circumstance. PG saw me and mmm, it was awesome, miss seeing old friends. Its always amazing seeing people you least expect. Sometimes you ask, but sometimes it just happens, but i enjoy it nonetheless.

goodtimes in a place called diamond jamboree

to be back....take II

2009-07-17T08:01:00.000-07:00

i'm in LA....i really don't know why. besides the fun with friends and sttuffs....it feels a lil wierd. Its like seeing a childhood movie when your an adult....its just not the same.

ok to put it in contxt. I used to go to LA nearly twice a year growing up. Kinda like me giong to florida or hawaii once a year. Both were to visit my grandparnets. But in both cases these all stopped once high school and college began. my grandparents in LA moved back to vitnam, and my family jsut didn't have the time to travel to florida. and well for hawaii, we jsut went other places now that we werenow old enough to enjoy like NY or paris. So a trip that was once the fixture. was just ended.

not gonna lie, these trips are still fun, but its like playing in your childhood backyard that you almost don't remember. I guess its like rewatching bambi.....its not really new, but i can't really remember whats happening.

i wonder if it'll be like this when i come back to davis as the years go on. Cuz honestly i don't think i'm going to visit often, unless i have like a job in sac. I don't do visitations all that well.

to walk the place where i grew up, and have nothing the same. jsut a few buildings, a few intersections, but no longer a place where i could call home

where will i go next? where will God take me?

the art of getting lost

2009-07-15T14:10:00.000-07:00

guys seem to always get crap for never asking directions....and really its kind of well deserved. My dad never asked for directions, and no matter how much i couldn't stand getting lost for hours...i never ask either. Call it pride, stubbornness, whatever you want, but there is something greatly satisfying of getting somewhere by your own power and will( even with the help of google maps).

but realistically even following those directions get you pretty lost, i still like my maps...i keep like a library of California maps in my trunk...why i would drive to san diego is beyond me, but i'm prepared.

Why i'm on this train of thought was because of fourth of july weekend (and an article in gq). so the plan was to pick up andy from san jose, and than 2 girls from Berkley and play around in sf and meet with mary and the epic gang. usually i map out all my directions, punch them into google maps to see if i'm correct and stuffs, but this time i just took the gps. looks kinda like this one:
not gonna lie...it makes my life a ton easier. Like i don't get lost, and if i amke a wrong turn, it puts me on track. But when i looked up...i realize i have no idea or context of where i am...just at my destination. i'm not really paying attention ot the city...just the audio cues. i felt kinda of robbed of the experience of being somewhere new.

getting lost really got me ble to know my freinds neighborhoods, cities, or jsut random places. I knew where to go if i ever visted again...since i was lost there. Getting lost gets me super observant, since i'm kinda bent on getting non lost. So i learn the city wether i planned to or not.

the gps was nice, but it took that away from me. I like using my maps, playing with highlighters, or just knowing where i was driving was a big square that hopefully brought me back to my original road. getting lost really isn't so bad. It almost fun, like an unplanned adventure.

cuz really what do you remember? being slightly late to a friends party? or being satisfied that you now know a lil bit more of san jose?

to look in wonder

2009-07-11T00:50:00.000-07:00

so i was driving around davis and mmm, its summer orientation!
haha dang was it that long ago?

what cuaght my eye was how young they were....the sense of bewilderment of what is davis. How large their eyes looked as they stared around so widely at the crosswalk. As if this small town was walking into a grand new world.

I guess being here so long, and having a car has made davis lose a little of its charm. coming form the city small towns are so intriuging. Cuz honestly miplitas, sanjose, fremont, livermore, all kind of the same. just income and if you have a good mall make it difference, but the feel is the same.

sometimes though i sitll look in wonder what this place really is. All the charm, the farmers market, the musicians playing near baskin robbins in the evening. Its all minda nice. Makes for nice lil dates of chill hang outs. mm imma miss it all.

i'm scared

2009-06-29T13:13:00.000-07:00

sometimes i wonder...how do they do it

to face the odds, to face fear and throw it aside

i really admire those who can do that

i feel sometimes i act fearless, but inside i'm just as scared

wether is asking out a girl, being vulnerable with the guys or going off to the peace corps

i'm still the guy i was 4 years ago

only difference i feel is God

knowing he's there and really trusting him allows me to takes those chances

but still i doubt...and i hate how i still doubt

i know it works out if i only trust Him

but i refuse to buy into it...

i keep making Him and his deeds the exception

not the rule in my life

everyone's been asking m what am i going to do....i really don't know

i'm looking wherever i can...and i'm scared...i feel so inadequate

and 2 years in the peace corps..that feels like forever

i know with God i will be safe....but i'm missing the safety that was college

mm, sometimes i'm so tired of the struggle, but i know it makes me stronger

may i stand up...with Him by my side....i can be great

mm i realize...

2009-06-25T13:32:00.001-07:00

that i'm kinda a hard person to shop for. and i sincerely apologize for all those that have tried.

i don't want all that much. I dunno if that means i'm patient, content, or simply unamibtious. i don't have a wishlist or things i would REALLY REALLY want to have. I'm kind of content with what i have now. well at least materially. i have scores of music, books, knick knacks, clothes. I still really haven't fully enjoyed what i already have. doesn't help that i don't like chocolate either...kinda rules out that nearly universal gift.

i think i get it from my dad. don't really want something till what i have is nearly worn through. Like i'd like new chucks, but i never had a real desires to want a new pair till i started to feel the rocks and pebbles under my sole. probably time to start thinking bout a new pair.

hmm, i think i really don't want that much what i can't have because its kind of like a wasted wish. I can't really get it, its not in my means to attain, so why want it? i don't have a job, or mebbe i don't have the skills to acquire it. So its nice, but mmm i can live without. i don't really mind something else will grab my eye soon enough.

well the reason why i think about this was that sonia and ray were planning to get me the pair of shoes that i really adored....but i ended up just driving back to sac to just get it myself...i had some grad money from high school, that i never used. i love the shoes...they are awesome, but i think i would've enjoyed it more as a gift, from friends. Instead its a small selfish act. Mebbe i feel so isolated cuz i don't give people the opportunity to love me.

i brush off encouragement, thanks. i'm not the easiest person for gift. i'm busy like mad (well not anymore). i'm kinda well rounded. and i guess i'm not all that touchy of a person.

i think i almost make it hard for people to fit into my life. i'm not making excuses, just an observation. I spend so much time trying to change the world, shape communities, helping others, there really is little time or little chance for people to be there for me.

i really do enjoy that some do make that effort and do get through, its really easier than it seems. I really enjoy having an impact in the world, but i do enjoy, sometimes even more, when people make an impact on me

i want a mixer

2009-06-24T22:38:00.000-07:00

haha.....i think i had another thought in my mind...but all i can think about is going back to baking.....jsut need a mixer...or some crazy mixing skills....though i doubt my ability to match an electric mixer.

what i want to bake.mm a mystery, mebbe you'll even get a taste

hopefully i like my new haircut

imma fix my bike soon, than sac trip! come with!

hi summer

2009-06-23T15:37:00.000-07:00

ok it begins..the post grad life begins....budgeting, resume, cove letters, insurance, responsibility...it all starts

ok honestly its not starting all that well...i think i'm getting sick...seriously every time i go home i think i catch a disease...but right now my head is stuffy and hurts.....although staying insdie is not all that bad....kinda hot outside...davis is back to normal.....hot...so very hot

well i finally got a move on with my future, submitting cover letters and resumes....feels legit..we'll see, hopefully something falls through

for all those on missions right now, i'll be praying for you, sry i've been bad on responding to those letters, but you all are seriously in my heart

this.Day it ends(begins)

2009-06-22T13:35:00.000-07:00

ok this blog is late cuz when i go home i do nothing but waste my life on tv, madden, and sleeping.

what does it feel like to be graduated?

many ask, and here is my answer

its free....its daunting.

to me its like stepping onto the pitch for the first time

years upon years of practice, skills, friendships, everything

its time to put it to the test

practice is over, its time for the game

i can finally be great! but i can also fail miserably

there are few redos in a real game

but victory is real sweet when you play the real deal

off the bench i go, just hoping not to trip on the first step

stef and gabe rock

2009-06-04T11:11:00.000-07:00

a;likejc jihia dfjihri ferki ch a uhhhhh.... fake justin ;= i am dead. oh no. mm.... i want to go to fruit picking! oh man. stef is so awesome and cool. gabe is hot. i love them both. like a lot. like a lot a lot. the end.

this.Day i never....

2009-05-24T11:30:00.000-07:00

said goodbye.....
so i learned this morning that my granddad had just passed away. He was in Vietnam. although it indeed is sad, it was not surprising. He was not terminal, or any accident, just time, he was 98 i think. I'm not sure how to feel right now.

i wish i had gone to Vietnamese school. honestly i was given the choice...i said no. all my friends hated Chinese cshool...why would i wanna go to viet school? or at least that's how i thought at the time. To this day i regret that decision, every single day. i feel a lost a part of me. i don't look viet, and really only my last name is a marker, but the more i listen to it, the more beautiful it sounds. ic an understand most, but i cannot speak it, and really that was the problem. my grandparents did not speak englsih and i did not speak viet.

however that did not prevent all communication. sometimes relatives translanted, sometimes they didn't....but i could always tell he was proud of me and my generation. Just a smile and warth when he looked at us. Talked about us, what schools we went to and what our dreams were. to him we were what he ahd wanted to be. He had only a 5th grade education, but he was able to successfully run a store, build a home downtown and send children to college in the US.

my family name is not actually nguyen, its vu. that's why it was a part of my middle name. but my granddad was adopted and changed last names. i thank him so much for what he's given this family, this life, given me. i jsut wish i could've told him. i wish i could've said goodbye. i wish i knew how

i need to seriosuly set time to learn viet...

this.Day i tried to sit still

2009-05-23T19:47:00.000-07:00

and so far i've failed. ok not gonna lie, having a chill day is kinda boring....i've forgotten what i do for free time. Like i've had free time but also very scheduled so when there is no shcedule i don't know what to do.

well besides wasting time on facebook, i'm wokring on my peace corps app again...i'm going to finsih this by tmw....i swear it

but right now thats not on my mind, please keep my grandparents in your prayers, whomeever reads this. their health is failing pretty fasy and its a realyl hard time for my dad as he ahs to fly to and from vietnam. yea preoccupied

this.Day Item #451

2009-05-20T10:03:00.000-07:00

item #451: LET'S BIKE TO SAC!
ok this would be on my bucket list, but i actually did this a couple times my sophomore year
its only a 15 mile ride each way! and its super flat and super straight.

well vsa went off to sac this past weekend and unfortunately it was conflicted with retreat and i wasn't able to go. Look Here they go!

anyone want to go? jsut get back to me and i'll organize the day, i'll be here in the summer

this.Day i just don't know

2009-05-20T00:56:00.000-07:00

these past few weeks have been extremely draining for me in so many ways. Besides culture show, 5 midterms during my rehearsal "hell week". my emotions were all effed up. like even without my intense time schedule....i was mess

once my schedule was kicking up, my dad's mom in Vietnam was checked into the hospital. Sadly i'm not close to her since i cannot speak vietnamese, but i was still freaking out. she is 96 i think and slipping to unconsciousness is not a good sign. What stressed me the most is i had no words or even knowledge on how to comfort my dad. i'm not a bad listener....but what does one say to one's parents?

adding to this paralysis in words was that both my parents owuld be flying to vietnam and would prolly not make it to my show. Like i know this sounds selfish and vain, but i really wanted to my parents to see what i stand for in college, what i'm proud of, and one part of my identity in college is about learning. my aprents had yet to attend anything i do in college and this is my final year so i really wanted them to see. and yea it was like... a letdown almost. i performed last year in front of a crowd of strangers, i wanted more than that this year.

yea it was a mess. i didn't know how to feel, in addition to an utter lack of time. i wanted my parents to come to my show....but msot of all i wanted to be prepared to ahve the words for my dad, lest the worst came to be. but i could have neither, nothing was in my control. i just don't know

edit:
btw my grandma is thankfully better and back home, thank you God and my mom made it to my show...my dad is still traversing the world though i think spain?

so it worked out....but for a while i was speechless, unable to do anything but go through the motions

this.Day i will fear no evil

2009-05-13T10:18:00.000-07:00

Hope for new day
hope to persevere
hope to truly forgive
hope to love like Him

And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?

Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me
-Matt Redman

this.Day i wait

2009-05-12T18:44:00.000-07:00

wait for the tide to come
God, pick me up, let me sail away
for i can row no longer

this.Day is day one

2009-05-11T10:09:00.000-07:00

sometimes i sit and wonder
why do i keep trying
why do i still stumble
why does nothing change
why everything
but i tell myself
and try to believe
just trust in Him
and make this day one

this.Day is thank you

2009-05-10T13:41:00.000-07:00

mm wow i enjoy legitimate surprises. no matter how much i like having everything under control or at least know whats going on...a good solid surprise really makes my day. so after owl and the sparrow (btw an amzing film, nearly made me cry), it was the vsa after culture show after party (kinda overdue). i wasn't planning on going, but whatever it was better than dc late night

so off i went to a quickly's run...you know for food and tea before partying it up all night...no big deal. cept it took effing forever (old white lady+ hk girl= line out the door). seriously the line did not move for 15 minutes. but mm after the ladies finally got ready we headed off to the party.
haha i usually don't like parties...big social settings are kidna overwhelming for me. but it wasn't too abd this time...i love the vsa cast...they are awesome to hang with. but than suddenly everyone started singing happy birthday (it was a double birthday me and amy). wow, yea seriously...in shock, but i love it=)

perosnlized cake and balloon...seriously, thank you vsa.....and props to linh, ni and crew for preparing the cake while i was in their living room....dang, hella skillz. and the night jsut got better, so much fun. thank you my vsa family!
lol the smoky picture

the next night was also fun as i went off to see oklahoma! it was a a great production. i really enjoy musicals. mondavi is so great. i haven't been there for a while, back when i used to watch ray and Kristine play. so very enjoyable. after tha head off to yoloberry and chill. that was really fun cept the whole i think its getting cold...but thank you all for really making it a wonderful night. i got to dress up, see a show, eat fro yo, and just sit down and chill and chat....seriously a pretty bomb night! thx

this.Day i give thanks!

2009-05-10T13:18:00.000-07:00

today especially for my mom. ironic thing is i actually drove home for mother's day, not my birthday, and i did not get to even get to see or hug her on mother's day, for she is driving my lil bro back down to santa cruz. mm but i did give her early flowers, once i got back from davis....hurray. I wanted to buy flowers in davis...but i don't think the 2 hour 90 degree ride in a car without a/c wold be healthy....i don't think its healthy for me, much less flowers.

To my mom!
i thank God every day
for you just being there
to wish me good hug or
run your fingers through my hair
i'm sorry i don't visit often
and fail at making calls
but my words cannot express
my gratitude, not at all
i'm amazed by your grace
and i adore your works of art
i think of you every day
no matter how long apart
so thank you for sacrifice
your time and your love
for in and out you are beautiful
and amazing as a dove

this.Day say hello!

2009-05-07T14:26:00.000-07:00

say HELLO! its officer nuno. he's the bike cop on campus nowadays....yea yea sounds a lil intense, but he's super awesome and always smiles....haha i love smiling old people. But yea so no more biking across the mu, but if you walk you bike he sometimes give out meals form the silo coupons....pure awesomeness. porlly the one cop i'm not scared of when he approaches me. oh davis gonna miss it much.

oh and i'm super excited to see oklahoma tmrw....mmm a show at mondavi. seriosuly if you ahven't already been there, its not only a beautiful venue, but has awesome perfoamnces and its super cheap for students. School is more than just classes, lets get cultured!

this.Day i am thankful

2009-05-04T09:55:00.000-07:00

i'm really so thankful for all those who came out to support the UCD VSA culture show. Seriously it means so much to me. To have more than just people to perform in front of, but friends, family, and peers. These are the the flowers the epic folk gave me. mm, lily, snap dragons, irises, snapdragons...haha among others(yea flower power). Like more than their support it was just really exciting to get flowers (or something) from someone other than family. i've never had anyone go to anything for me (family excluded). i did debate for 4 years and spectators were only other debaters trying to scout you. For track only my Spanish teacher cheered me on, cuz her daughter was actually a long distance runner, so she was one of mebbe 5 in the crowd. etc etc. It just i dunno, it felt so amazing to see good friends in the audience. Just makes me smile. Never had that feeling before. i'm so used to seeing the audience as a faceless mass. just people, nothing more. last year my life was backstage, mainly cuz there was no one in the audience to wave at, hug, or say hi to (my parents didn't even make it up). Just another show. But it felt so different, being proud to show everyone what your culture is, what your org can do, and really to share a piece of the vision that vsa aims for. well i think i'm becoming kinda verbose so i'll close. Thank you, thank you, thank you. when the applause comes from friends, family in peers, the feeling so much grander. Words cannot describe to have someone in the seats, looking down at you, and waiting outside those double doors. thank you so very much

mm well this thursday in chem 194 i want to see

let go! yea i know its during epic...boo

i think imma get those shoes today

this.Day impulse buy FAIL!

2009-05-04T01:23:00.000-07:00

oh man, just fell in love with these. i've never fallen for shoes or really anything i SUPER want, but dang this is intense. i might get these tmrw....if i cave from this impluse. $100 to spent (4 years in waiting)

the show was so fantastic and i thank you all for comign and supporting me, vsa and most of all VietHope. You are giving the oppurtunity for children in vietnam not only to gain an oprunity for education, but also help brign them away form the clutches of slavey, poverty, and oppression

thisDay Save LIVES!

2009-04-29T08:29:00.000-07:00

aww my final blood drive at davis....i think i only missed two. the fall quarter freshman year and one last year. but i made the gallon mark wooot.

well while i was giving blood and waiting in an abnormally long line the girl next to me asks me why do i give blood?

simple enough yea?

well i didn't really have a simple answer. I just kind of do it. I've been blessed with very few hospital visits and my family has fortunately not been in the ER or surgery room with any sort of frequency

i guess i give blood because i can. i guess i feel if one is in the position to help others and have the means to do so, one should. so i do. blood is renewable and its not like have a monster bike accident on a weekly basis, what's giving one pint. I don't really miss it when its gone, just a tad tired

oh and i realize the only donuts i ever eat in davis come from after giving blood....mmm sugary goodness

oh and there is another blood drive today if you want to go. Its in freeborn hall....oh and this is the t-shirt print if you just give for free clothing

this.Day i stargaze!

2009-04-28T13:18:00.000-07:00

well actually i study all about stargazers...the lily not the person. These are star gazer lilies. They are quite beautiful. I'm not sure of their significance since i haven't really read the book, but i think there was some dispute cuz some guy left seeds on a farm he sold. Apparently i'm studying for plant science which i really only took cuz a few of the lovely epic ladies are taking it. but now it makesme REALLY want to buy flowers. Its kinda all about flower appreciation and figure out how the are so pretty...at least that's what i am getting out of it.

For $15 you can get 1 CD, 1 bottle of wine, or 2 bouquets of flowers...what would you choose?

mmm, 5 midterms and my show is this saturday.....one heck of a hell week....i prefer just looking at the flowers instead of studying about them....time.....freeze.....now!

but seriously i would like any who actually read this blog to come to my show....i would really appreciate people coming out to not only support me, but the Vietnamese and Vietnamese american community

this.Day Learn to Spit and Shine

2009-04-27T10:14:00.000-07:00

ok i finally got around to cleaning and polishing my shoes after a full day or practice. its really not that hard.

1) first you get a damp cloth just to condition the shoe

2) next you work the polish into the shoe

3) than use a brush or cloth to knock off excess polish

4) add a few drops of water ("the spit") to the polish

5)rub super fast and a lil pressure to make the shine

and bam shiny shoes to go to that fancy function

oh and wear gloves...the polish tends to get attracted to everything and makes you look like a grease monkey

mmm look the pretty ladies of vsa!we have a show May 2nd at main theater at 7:30pm. Please come out support. I don't have anymore tickets on me but fgo to the freeborn ticket office. Its only $10 pre-sale and 15 at the door

this.Day was mmm

2009-03-28T19:49:00.000-07:00

well this is kinda a late post but mm. so i spent tuesday with hai in santana row and we decided lets be french and hit up this place called Left Bank where they served french food and spoke rather poor french. its quite wonderful.

oh and if you're wondering the significance of the left bank is that it refers to the left side of the river Seine that runs through Paris, highlighting the most romantic districts of Paris and the home of artists, philosophers and various artists, like Matisse!

haha, you're probably wondering what this is, mebbe even fearful.
This is steak tartare. yes it is raw....you eat sushi don't hate. well its made of minced high grade beef served with onions, seasonings and the lil round things called capers (flower buds). yes you eat flower buds they are quite wondrous, albeit a lil salty. mm. i haven't had this since i was last in Paris, but its was rather good, its hard to miss on Santana row. the texture is quite interesting, as it feels nothing like a steak or burger. just imagine beef sashimi, slightly slimy kind of feeling. it flavors are simple, powerful and it looks small, but its quite a meal. Yes and no scarfing this stuff down. you don't jsut demolish fine food, its kinda of a waste.

instead be french, just eat, have a good conversation, take plenty of time, and have no fear of this food getting cold, its actually served a lil chilled. mmm. i missed french food. some of it is kinda out there, but so is asian food. but the portions are small, yet perfectly sized. Just enough to be satisfied, but never enough to get food coma. Always ready to live on your day, to continue the brisk exploration of the city of lights.

and of we finish off with a creme brulee. which is just a caremel with a blazed sugar crusting. its quite delicious and very rich. mm. i rarely get dessert, for pie and cake are not my thing, but this is absolutely decadent and delightful

this.Day i miss

2009-03-27T19:43:00.000-07:00

i miss the calls i used to make
no matter how hard is was for me
it was a reason more than work
a fear from phones, had to shake
i miss being chased
a feeling rarely felt
i feeling i can't explain
simply make me melt
so used to saying goodbye
just leaving in a stride
someone i actually might miss
if i just lay down my pride

this.Day i remember

2009-03-19T20:16:00.000-07:00

i remember what it tastes like
the sweet crunch as my teeth bite in
nearly forgotten what is was
the feel of the slick apple skin
the day seems so pleasant
a cool breeze blows on through
reminds me of all the times
just sitting down with you
i hope it isn't the final goodbye
i hope we shall meet again
that our paths will cross once more
make my life less plain
it may have been short
but i leave with no regrets
thank for the moments
and the memories, don't fret
shall your journey be blessed
and until we meet next
i'll shall pray for you
and wish for the best

this.Day should freeze frame

2009-03-17T19:15:00.000-07:00

stop.
watch the kids play
freeze.
as the sun shines through
slow.down
and remember today
savor.
hanging out with you
remember.
the words i said today
grateful.
for the conversations had
saddened
studying gets in the way
encouraged.
friends with a person so rad

this.Day i am weak

2009-03-15T21:10:00.000-07:00

i just had a fast kick my ass
i couldn't do it
not today
such a fail
my head hurt, my mind unfocused
it was nearly impossible to study
its usually a breeze
not even a thought
something is different today
i wonder whats up?
why was i so weak?
why did i break?
God what are you telling me?
i am listening

this.Day i want to feel

2009-03-13T02:06:00.000-07:00

i realize again today i come from a rather privileged background
i don't really have a crappy family life, and they are rather support me whatever i do
even peace corps apparently, i though it be a struggle
but somehow, they are egging me on. i just thank God for that
but the reason why i go, is because i want to feel
feel the pain
feel the suffering
feel the hardship that i have never been through
cuz right now, i know i can't.
No matter how much i care for a person, i can't make those tears go away
i can' fix those shattered dreams because i simply cannot understand
i have not lived it
i want to be able to feel it, see it, understand it

this.Day i was late

2009-03-11T10:20:00.001-07:00

once again i'm late....i've only been late two other times this quarter, and one of them was monday
i can no longer wake up without an alarm
and even than i just reset it to a later time
8am once the norm for most this quarter
seems to be a far off dream
why does my heart hang so heavy
when i feel so content

i hate how my left petal is loose

this.PastWeek felt forever

2009-03-09T10:27:00.000-07:00

on the day of the sun
went to olson i do
to rehearse all day
with a phone conference in lieu
ended with a meeting
sorted everything in the air
but we came out smiling
for the no president there
the day that followed
wrote papers that were due
than Tuesday came round
it was over , done and through
no regrets, no hard feelings
all i can think is "thank you"
put in my life for
the time that He willed
now we part paths
climb our own hills
the night of day next
was double meetings to the morn
than jammed a dinner+meeting
before the food every grew warm
from photohunt to sunrise
the weekend begun
for the day that followed
was a race bundled with fun
from pigs that dance
to alex's place
we learned about davis, each other
but my team got first place!! (Go stef, john, howard, albert!)
the weekend came to a close
a trip through davis, SJ and Sac
mmm i'm tired of driving
can i have my 350 miles back?

so this was my week, the days feel weeks apart
i should prolly get studying, give my apps a new start

this.Day it begins anew

2009-03-08T12:09:00.000-07:00

mm, lets see if this lil experiment works
i used to have a xanga like for 3 years of high school
full of poems, rants, publiticy
imma try to fill this more regularly
and with more substance
to this day it begins
a blog once again